Chapter Two Reading!

Last week I posted up an article and link that took people to a video upload of me reading the first chapter in Trinity – The Prophecy. I was so nervous that I was hyperventilating and just about breaking apart. I wanted to pull it down. But, with the encouragement from my fans and friends both on my blog, Facebook page and street team I left it up. I had an overwhelming response on my Facebook page, which meant little traffic to YouTube its self, but it gave me the courage to post Chapter two.

Still nervous and nearly throwing up before I started recording I pushed through with a few little errors and hiccups mixed with some of my trademark facial expressions.

I am starting to enjoy this, apart from the nerves. I have been receiving lots of messages about my awesome Aussie accent (which I find dull and boring lol). Lots of praise for jumping out of my comfort zone for my fans and giving a little piece of myself to them.

As an Aussie author, it is extremely hard.

One problem is postage. I have so many lovely readers over on the other side of the big blue pond that want signed copies of my books. But, postage cost an arm and half a leg, sometimes a full 3 limbs if it’s all three books. E.g., Crystal bought 3 copies. It cost $73 to post them. She covered the cost as I can’t, but not everyone can do this.

Problem two. Travel. I am scared of flying, I would need to boat it over on a cruise ship with lots of sexy male staff members (all research pervs I swear) but, I still need a passport. Costs, for travel, accommodation, etc. I honestly cannot say I will make it over to America unless a big shot movie producer pay’s to have my books made into a movie or TV show.

So for now, it is just me and my IPad video camera :(

I am not the only author with this problem. Even those in the US already would find it hard to even drive a few hours as the eBook industry is being taken over by millions of authors. Sales are low, reviews rarely get left even if I receive a message saying how much they loved it.

My point. I am not a writer for money. That would be silly of me. But, I am a writer for the reader and that means I must push myself that extra mile for them. Like stepping out of my comfort zones so they can have a little piece of me.

My theory is… If you have just ONE person that loves your work, that is who you write for!

My new theory… If only one person watches my video of myself reading my books to the world that is who I record for :p

So, this is Chapter Two in Trinity – The Prophecy. I hope you enjoy it. Please subscribe or give me a thumbs up or thumbs down.

You are all AMAZEBALLZ!!! 

Click here for Chapter Two in TRINITY - The Prophecy  

As Shy as a Possum! Chapter One

Hello my lovely’s :D

I have decided to take a big jump with author problems #327. I am so shy when it comes to talking to people I don’t know or approaching people when I am by myself. I have never asked anywhere to do a book launch or to have my books except my local Library. Which did not go so well as the lady was really rude and made me want to run and hide behind a bookshelf.

Anyways, I came up with this plan as I also have a problem with talking in front of crowds of people I know and strangers. What better practice that to read my work to the whole internet world? Don’t get me wrong, I am not excepting thousands and millions of people to watch this, but even a hand full will be more than I have spoken in front of before :p

Ok, each week I will be reading a chapter from my book. I am going to make mistakes and get shy, but I am hoping down the track I will learn to speak fluently and confidently in case I ever decide to do a launch or Meet the Author event.

I figure if I can do it under the pressure of potential millions watching me, a small crowd of ten people will be easy hahaha

Wish me luck xox

Click here for Chapter One

 

To Much Pressure!

I struggle with a lot of setbacks and tests being a writer. Not only am I dyslexia and have no idea where to put commas, etc. but I shake really bad which in turn, makes my writing really messy.

As far back as I can remember I have always had a shaking problem. If I am nervous, it shows and my whole body won’t stay still. If I am uncomfortable, it stands out so bad which makes me shake more knowing it's so obvious. 

I have so many people that don't know me always ask, "Are you okay?" 

I just brush it off with an up in the air joke about my shaking and try to ease my nerves. 

Unfortunately, this also impacts my writing life when it comes to signing books. I am so nervous and worried my bad writing will be judged or that I will make an error that my words are choppy, messy and not perfect.

I really pride myself in how far I have come, especially from where I came from. I try so hard to infuse that pride when signing a book, that this special person supporting me should have the best writing ever... Never happens. 

I sit here and wonder as I type this out, am I putting too much pressure on myself? Is it making the problem worse? 

I never wanted to start a blog, because of my dyslexia and I am so worried about being judged by others if the wrong word is used. Or, the comma is in the wrong spot.

Then I ask, am I over thinking everything?

In a world that seems so chaotic, I find myself trying to be perfect, which will never happen. 

I cannot make everyone happy. I cannot write with a perfect hand. I cannot type with a perfect knowledge of the English language. I know all this, yet I still put that pressure on myself. 

I need to learn to let go and embrace who I am and who I have become. 

So what if I make mistakes. I am only human. 

Who cares if I can’t write neatly? I am only human.

But, I still don’t believe the words that come out of my mouth and still strive to be better... I am only human, after all, :p